Alone

A distantly familiar pain again envelops the body, flooded the heart and saturated the soul as though I were floating amidst it all the while. Then, I was struck. I was dented. I was punctured allowing it to drench me from within. Its intensity numbs my nerves making it difficult to move, to breathe. Its venom paralyzes my mind so any sense, any caution, any means to keep from drowning is rendered powerless. Inherent optimism attempts to float. Overactive imagination struggles to swim. Foolish love wrestles the ferocious falls and engulfing waves flowing from the wound, but all in vain. Any dreams I have labor as though mid flames and not these merciless floods. Out of nowhere this came. One moment my being soared above all trials, all which threatened, and was shot down heartlessly. Left to flail. Left to fall alone. So now, I sit, lie, walk, run, stand… I no longer know. All that is human has left me. I simply am.. I am submerged. I am hurt. I am wounded. But for this, there is no medicine. No cure. No treatment whatsoever. Along this path that is mine alone I came alone I shall go alone is all I know how to be. A minute, a mile, a moment, half of a lifetime is how long I’ll be with you. With her. With him. With all of you. But forever with me. A soul separates from the me you see but remains a piece of the me I’ll never cease to be. Dripping with the watery pain mind, heart and soul are eventually wrung out by what most would call ‘time’.

- Jessica Mary